Friday, June 03, 2005
My Key Turning Point Experiences Between August 11, 1989 Through July 10, 1993
The following narrative is one that I have e-mailed to many that describes what I call the 'Highlights of the Process of My Discovery'. This true life religious experience led me to conclude, beyond all doubt, that I was meant to publicize, to the world-at-large, the extremely rare confluence of three celestial events in the year 1999 that fulfilled all of the celestial events described by Christ in Matthew 24:29 to His apostles in 30 A.D. As I mention in my blog, 'The Essence of the Olivet Discourse', the probability of these three diverse 1999 celestial events all occurring within any given 12 month period of time is on the order of only once every 100,000 years.
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Dr. Niall Ferguson,
If you are interested in the highlights of the process of my discovery, attached below is the first of two e-mails that I have saved in my 'Messages Sent' folder that I am sending you. As with all difficult experiences, gaining these seldom-considered insights were as difficult as pulling hen's teeth but, as is usually the case, they are clear in hindsight.
The letter below is the beginning of 'the following three years would turn out to be a concerted effort on my part to get to the bottom of the truth', beginning in March, 1989 as mentioned in my blog, 'The Essence of the Olivet Discourse'.
Supersweet101
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On August 11, 1989, Denise broke the news to me that she could only be married to a man of her denomination. By this time, I had a small toe hold in the Two Witnesses story of Chapter 11 of Revelation. My main reaction was one of amusement as Denise did not know of the Matthew 24:29-30a prophecy or the Chapter 11 story and I wondered, "How is this going to turn out?"
I trusted God to provide for me the answers that I would need during the upcoming months and He did. About two weeks later, Denise told me over the phone that she was now in a committed relationship, which I correctly assumed was Eddie.
I was a veritable religious zealot at this time but still pretty much a private one. I assumed that somehow, at some time, I would identify some world leader with '666' as according with Revelation 13:18.
On September 12, 1989, as I was driving down a highway in Columbia, MO (where I was living), I was recalling solving a very difficult number progression problem on an IQ test during a hospitalization eight months earlier and, after I solved it, I handed the test back to a nurse and I told her, "I got the son of a bitch!" As I completed that thought as I was driving, I noticed that in front of me, I was following a car that had a license plate ending with '666', which I thought was unusual. That evening, I inscribed in the front of my Bible of Discovery '9-12-89', signifying that I was 100% certain that I was one of the two individuals in Revelation 11:3. I realized that, theoretically, sometime before Spring, 1996 (6 1/2 years away), I should identify this Antichrist but I was worried that I might slip up and miss it.
(The number progression problem that took me 5 minutes to solve was:
4123, 82, 73, 14_
The answer is at the very end of this narrative.)
Six days later, on September 18, 1989, I was in traffic and at a stop light, and I was once again behind a car with a license plate ending with '666' which, of course, I picked up on. That evening, I went home, turned on the TV and watched the last 15 minutes of the movie, "A Star is Born" (on the Lifetime Channel) with Kris Kristofferson and Barbra Streisand. After the movie was over, on a nearby coffee table was a 9-15-89 issue (3 days old) of a USA Today newspaper and I quickly saw a headline that said: 'Boris Yeltsin: A Star is Born' about Russian leader Boris Yeltsin who was touring this country and wowing politicians here as he was an up-and-coming politician in the USSR. From this article, I read that when Yeltsin was a child, a hand grenade exploded in his left hand causing him to lose a thumb and index finger on that hand.
Because I was certain that I had come 'face to face' with the person who was to kill me around March, 1996 (in fulfillment of Revelation 11:7-13), I was extremely scared. As I wrote in my manuscript, "All of a sudden, I did not want to be a Chapter 11 witness!"
The following day, I went to Gerbes supermarket where I did my grocery shopping and paced the aisles for 10 minutes or so. I had decided that when I stopped pacing, I would imagine being killed by Yeltsin's forces----and I did not want to stop pacing!!! When I did stop pacing, I closed my eyes and winced.
During this time, I thought that Denise and I would eventually get back together, hopefully soon, and I assumed that Denise and I would perform an openly public ministry on a worldwide scale between Fall, 1992 through Spring, 1996, which meant public speaking which I greatly detested. Three days after associating Yeltsin with '666', I read Chapter 12 of Revelation for the first time on September 21, 1989. I quickly suspected the male child in Revelation 12:5 to be me and within three seconds of analyzing 'iron rod', I saw my 'felt pen' and 'female name' and I was greatly relieved because if there was one thing that I can do and enjoy doing, it was writing.
(My Bible reads in Revelation 12:5, "She gave birth to a son--a boy destined to shepherd all the nations with an iron rod.")
[This is because from chemistry, the chemical symbol for iron is Fe. Felt pens (with the trademark 'Skilcraft') are in the shape of a 'rod' and have been my pen of choice since I began my engineering career with the USDA in 1976, 13 years earlier. And, lastly, 'Rod' is a 'male name'. Very soon after analyzing 'iron rod' in Revelation 12:5, I easily saw the following:
iron rod
-|- --- |
Fe(lt) Pen = Skilcraft
Fe male name = Denise
At this time, September 21, 1989, I was amazed at how a 1900 year old scripture could easily be interpreted as being two instruments germane to me (and I still am) but it answered some very fundamental questions as to how I would publicize this interpretation of Matthew 24:29-30a to the world-at-large.]
All during the last part of August and all of September, 1989, I noticed many unusual coincidences that I simply could not explain away as being meaningless and I believed that they were divine in nature and I jotted them on my wall calendar. One that I had noticed at this time was that the driver's license that I had when I first wrote Denise had a renewal date of September 3, 1988 which would turn out to be the date of her heart-lung transplant operation three weeks after I met Denise. And, as it is in many states, on the back side of Missouri driver's licenses is a donor's card one can sign to be an organ donor. Because there were three years (1095 days) between renewal dates for Missouri driver's licenses (in 1989), I knew that I could not have made up a more perfect sign from God.
On October 4, 1989, I realized that I was getting out of control due to my religious zeal and, as per my brother's recommendation, I admitted myself into a psychiatric ward as I saw this as an opportunity to establish the truth by telling my story to a psychiatrist and he would surely be able to tell that no other Christian astronomer living at this time has experienced an account as unique as mine. After assuring me that, "What will be, will be. The medicine should not matter," my doctor would tell me that my signs from God were merely loose associations and that my belief that I was in Revelation 12:5 was a delusion and was a departure from reality---which shocked me that my credibility would ever be questioned by anyone!
In the hallway of the psyche ward while my doctor was between seeing patients, I cornered him, showed him my old driver's license and explained to him the extraordinary coincidence of the renewal date matching the date of Denise's heart-lung transplant operation and how that was a one out of a 1000 coincidence. My doctor nodded in acknowledgement and went about treating other patients.
Two weeks after admission, I was drugged out of my gourd from the meds that I had blindly agreed to take and I was so extremely embarrassed of the belief that I had when I entered the hospital.
One month later, that belief came back and I admitted myself back into the hospital to try one more time to obtain 'validation' and once again, 11 days later, I was discharged feeling horrible from the side effects of the meds.
Years later, I would realize that of all the things that my doctor knew for certain when he met me, two of them were:
1) He did not know whether or not I was truly in Rev. 11:3 and Rev. 12:5
2) He knew that he would never know whether or not I was in Rev. 11:3 and Rev. 12:5
After spending an excruciatingly miserable winter of 1989-1990, my doctor changed my meds to very mild ones and, three weeks later, I could not believe how good life could feel again. In my manuscript I wrote, "In April, 1990, life was again sweet. I was very thankful to my doctor for ridding me of the 'Revelation Demon'."
I once again became productive at work, though I did not like my job as well as my previous one.
On June 5, 1990, I wrote a 15 page letter to Denise's father, partly to explain the delusion that I had suffered from and that I was $10,000 poorer and almost lost my job. In my letter, I referred to that driver's license coincidence and wrote, "I wondered why God would allow that one out of a 1000 coincidence to trip me up even further."
I made a copy of that lengthy letter and gave it to my doctor the next morning, to which he asked me, "What do want me to do with this?"
I replied, "I just want you to read it. I feel better with you having it."
I primarily wanted my doctor to know that I had a better understanding of my delusion. A night or two later, as I pictured Denise's parents reading my letter (and hoping that it would tug at their consciences), I thought of the reference I made to that one out of a 1000 driver's license coincidence and realized that it was similar to a baseball hitter having a 0.999 batting average---a pretty darn good one! At that moment, a physiological sensation flowed from the top of my brain throughout my nervous system and my whole body had a warm flush feeling for a second or two. I immediately suspected that this sensation was caused by the cumulative effect of all the medicine that I had taken during the previous seven months and I decided to see my doctor the next morning concerning the significance of that driver's license coincidence.
At about 6:30 a.m. the next morning, I approached my doctor in the hallway of the psyche ward and I told him, firmly, "That driver's license wasn't a sign from God. It was a billboard from God with a small hole in it."
In a slightly disgusted tone of voice, my doctor asked me, "If you ARE this person, what are you worried about? I have patients to attend to. I don't have time for you!"
I slowly turned away from him with my jaw dropping very far with, I am sure, a very astonished look on my face. I don't think that anyone can understand the level of shock that registered inside of me when this same doctor who had spent the previous eight months telling me and convincing me that this whole belief that I had discovered in a timely way was an unfortunate delusion was now telling me that it might be true after all.
I would be approved for disability retirement in October, 1990, partly because I couldn't concentrate on my job when I had this pre-ordained destiny consuming my mind and also partly because I hated my job which seemed extremely trivial in comparison.
I moved back to southeast Missouri, fully expecting to reunite with Denise and we would prepare for our worldwide ministry that scripturally would take place between Fall, 1992 through Spring, 1996 and then we would be killed by the Antichrist in the person of Boris Yeltsin who I would be announcing to the world was the aspiring Antichrist and my and Denise's fulfillment of Revelation 11:7-13 would show this and I could not wait to prove lots of people wrong!
And then on December 13, 1990, I began to think the unthinkable: What if there really is no Antichrist? I caught myself wondering if this was wishful thinking on my part to be spared of the fate described in Rev. 11:7-13. I then began to consider the immense suffering that I went through for my faith and, of course, Denise also went through indescribable suffering with her heart-lung transplant operation and recovery and I began to see that these are the trials and sufferings that the Two Witnesses would go through. I also knew of a pre-existing principle that argued against the concept of an Antichrist and it is one that I learned in the early 1980s through my interest in investing, the Principle of Contrarian Opinion, which says:
Whenever there is a wide consensus on a point, it is usually wrong.
This was true in October, 1929 and also in 2000 when bullishness on the stock market was so extreme that everyone who was planning to buy stocks had bought, leaving the market vulnerable to selling pressure, thus sending the market down.
I thought, "Every Bible has the Antichrist story in the Book of Revelation."
So, to implement the principle of contrarian opinion, I mailed a letter of warning (containing the Matthew 24:29-30a prophecy) to Moscow and also mailed a copy of that letter to the Wall Street Journal.
The following November, 1991, I committed myself to conducting a letter-writing effort to those in the highest positions of power, authority, and influence for the rest of my life and am continuing to do so (though it has slowed down considerably as of late).
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Dr. Ferguson,
In the narrative that I e-mailed to you before this one that describes my key turning point experiences between August 11, 1989 through December 13, 1990, it ends with my realizing that the scene described in Revelation 11:7-13 may very well be incongruent with reality. This led me to mailing a several page letter to the Kremlin in Moscow containing what I concluded is the only plausible interpretation of Matthew 24:29-30a and I mailed a copy of this letter (which I wrote anonymously) to the Wall Street Journal. I would later look back on mailing those two letters as being the beginning of demonstrating to myself that the Antichrist concept is a myth and that I have suffered enough.
Two months later, in February, 1991, I stopped by an empty Catholic church in Poplar Bluff, Missouri to pray for a few minutes, anxiously waiting to hear from Denise (as I had written letters to her family explaining my situation). I also asked God why doors were not opening up for me at a time when it seemed that doors should be opening up for me as I simply could not get anything 'off the ground' despite the conventional wisdom, it seemed, that this outwardly open ministry, by definition, should certainly get off the ground.
I then got up the courage to talk to a Catholic priest and, after exchanging a few pleasantries, I had to ask him, "Are you aware of Matthew 24:29?!"
The priest cautiously replied, "I think it has to do with the Last Days."
I then recited Matthew 24:29-30a to the priest as I had this scripture memorized since age 9 or 10 and I then rattled off those three 1999 celestial events described in my web posting and I would later put on cards.
The priest replied, "Yes, I've heard of that," which struck me as very odd.
I told this priest that Chapter 11 of the Book of Revelation speaks of Two Witnesses who are to prophesy. I sheepishly admitted to him, "I went to a psychiatrist to try to get a piece of paper saying that I was one of those Two Witnesses but I didn't get one."
I feared for what kind of negative reaction this priest might have for me and he gently pointed out, "None of the prophets had a piece of paper."
After I realized what this priest was saying, I exclaimed, "That's right!" And I thought, "Come to think of it, Jesus didn't have a piece of paper, either."
When we parted company, this priest told me, "1999 will be nice."
Three months later, in May, 1991, I wrote in a letter to the late Dr. Carl Sagan of Cornell University, "I guess it took me a long time before I realized that no one is going to walk up to the boy in Revelation 12:5 and say, 'Hey, you are the center of Revelation.'"
I moved to Hannibal the following month, June, 1991, and I mentioned to my mother that I was weaning myself off of the meds which, as you can imagine, greatly concerned her and she insisted that I see my psychiatrist to find out what meds I should be taking.
I agreed to see him and I was kind of curious of what my doctor thought of my beliefs. So, on June 19, 1991, I saw my doctor for a 30 minute session and I explained to him that my mother insisted that I see him. I raised my arms up along both sides of my head, flipped my hands backwards and I flippantly told my doctor, "I'm in Revelation and that's it."
He prescribed 5 mg Navane and explained, "This won't change your thoughts but it will help your thinking."
I told him that I still thought that I was meant to publicize this interpretation of Matthew 24:29-30a to the world.
My doctor asked me, "You want to prophesy?"
I replied, "No, interpret."
He asked, "Tell the world?"
I replied, "Yes."
He asked, "Why?"
I exclaimed, "So people will get their act together! To reduce the odds of there being an Antichrist."
He replied, "I thought you said that there was no Antichrist."
I replied, "I don't know."
For the first time, I explained to him how I associated Boris Yeltsin with '666' on September 18, 1989 (two weeks before I first met my doctor). I went on to tell him how I mailed a letter of warning to Moscow and a copy of that letter to the Wall Street Journal six months earlier hoping to make a difference.
As this session drew to a close, I welled up with a fierce sense of anger and self-pity and I yelled at my doctor, "A year ago, it dawned on me that no one's going to tell that boy (in Revelation 12:5) who he is!!"
My doctor gently replied, "I think you're right," followed by him looking up at me twice from his note pad, which I knew was unusual and out of character for him to do and I wondered what that double glance meant. I occasionally pondered on that double glance during the next four months until I realized on October 21, 1991 that he had told me the words that I had waited 21 months to hear my doctor tell me: "I think you're right."
(I jumped up off my sofa and wrote on my wall calendar on that date, 10-21-91, "I.T.Y.R.")
Years later, I was able to better express this in that my doctor's double glance was likely his way to let me know that I had gained an insight that perhaps a first year psychiatry major knows and that is:
"If any person is ever born into this world who has a genuine, scripturally pre-ordained destiny, that no human being is going to tell that person that he or she does, indeed, have one."
At the end of my last session with my doctor on June 19, 1991, he gave me the unsolicited advice, "Don't talk about it," which seemed to run against conventional wisdom for me at that time but, fortunately, I eventually understood why he gave me that advice, as I told a woman in 1998, "I see two reasons why he gave me that advice:
1) If I am wrong, bad things happen to me if I talk about it.
2) If I am correct and I talk about it, bad things happen to me."
This woman observed, "You lose either way." And I nodded my head in agreement.
In April, 1993 was the Waco tragedy involving David Koresh and the Branch Davidians and some commentators at that time worried that with the approach of the turn of the millennium that there may be more groups like them pop up. And this is what led me to write my manuscript, starting in May, 1993, to try to head off such groups--plus I needed to record my quite extensive biographical details before it became a real struggle to recollect them.
I was in touch with a vanity press at the time and they told me on July 6, 1993 that I needed Denise's written permission to include her many letters to me (which are very glowing and flattering of me) in my book should it get published. That upcoming Saturday, July 10, 1993, was Denise's day of worship and I decided to make the four hour trip from Hannibal to her church to obtain her written permission and I planned to mail a note to her parents telling them of my plan to come down (at this time, I am not on the best of terms with them, to put it mildly).
Before I mailed that note, I called the sheriff of Denise's home county to tell him of my plan to come down that Saturday and the reason why.
The sheriff replied, "Oh, the Rauls girl (Denise) passed away a couple of weeks ago."
I, of course, was shocked (but not surprised as it had been nearly 5 years since Denise's heart-lung transplant operation). I asked the sheriff, "Did you hear it from a reliable source?"
He replied, "Oh, it had been going around that she had been going down for a while."
I finished by saying, "Well, I'll definately not be going down there."
I took a brief hiatus from writing my manuscript over the next few days and I knew how my manuscript (and my personal account with Denise) would probably conclude---I just didn't know when, for sure. It was a very strange feeling as I was all by myself and very alone in this thought process. My recollection of what I wrote near my manuscript's conclusion is:
"I once again realized that Dr. Frazier's words, almost religious in nature, would prove to be true: "What will be, will be. The medicine should not matter." On June 1, 1989, I pictured Denise and myself as being the Two Chapter 11 Witnesses and as I thought these thoughts on July 10, 1993, I noticed a small smile emerging on my face. I was going to be able to undercut Eddie (Denise's husband) after all. Today, the fifth anniversary of learning of Denise and her plight would be a superb day to declare Denise to be the female witness of Chapter 11 of the Book of Revelation in the Christian Holy Bible! I was very pleased to give Denise an honor that her family did everything in their power to keep from her."
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Well, Bethany, because I am a hunt-and-peck type typist, using only one hand, my right hand is getting that 'carpal tunnel feeling' so I am going to have to stop. I did want to give you a substantive account of how my manuscript concludes. I really did, all along, want to reconcile with Denise and I was able to.
(Do you understand why I believe that my manuscript is 'The Second Greatest Story Ever Told'?)
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The e-mail above was originally written to a well known writer for a financial news magazine who has been kind enough to correspond with me, despite her busy schedule.
Because my 21 months of psychotherapy described in these two e-mails took place over 13 years ago, it seems like it happened to someone else (thank God). But I am nevertheless very proud of accomplishing what I call 'The Ultimate Mental Challenge'.
As I told a local TV news anchorwoman in February, 1999 when she called me in response to the letter that I wrote to her, "It's just that by 1991, I realized that no one's going to tap that person on the shoulder and say, 'Hey, you are meant to do this,' and by 1992, I realized that there are no perks that come with this belief system and that my place in scripture and 27 cents will buy me coffee at Hardees."
She replied, "Huh."
When she asked me, "What do you hope to achieve? What is your goal?", I replied, "Oh, gosh, I don't know, uh......to have a cohesive effect, uh.....that current world leaders to try to solve the world's problems before Christ returns."
I hope these two e-mails make some sense to you. If one is not interested in astronomy, they probably are a little difficult to understand.
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Shown below is the cover letter that I wrote in January to the Dean of the College of Engineering at my alma mater (where I earned a B.S. in engineering in 1976) in which I describe to him my writing effort since 1991.
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(Transcribed on May 8, 2004)
January 6, 2004
Dear Dean Xxxxxxx,
I decided to write you this letter and send you the enclosed materials on a hunch that my e-mail to you last month likely piqued your curiosity, if you're like most engineers.
On the last page of my 4 page mass mailing letter dated April 16, 1998 (which is enclosed) is a synopsis of my manuscript and letter writing effort in the form of a query letter to prospective publishers and what I call 'The Chronology of My Discovery'. Because religious experiences are, by definition, nearly impossible to successfully communicate to another, I will not spend any time to do so in this letter. It would turn out to take about two years before I gained an insight that my psychiatrist likely possessed when I met him in October, 1989: If any person is ever born into this world who has a genuine, pre-ordained destiny that no human being is going to tell that person that he or she does, indeed, have one. (Essentially, I am fulfilling a role similar to the one that John the Baptist had in that I am heralding Christ's Second Coming. I have found that in this world that this can only be done through writing.)
I have told a few in recent years that had I known, while I was in college, what was in store for me at age 35 in 1989, I would have enrolled in a college course entitled:
Genuine Scripturally Pre-ordained Destinies 101:
What to Expect and What Not to Expect
By October, 1991, I realized that if it is true that I am one of the two individuals in Revelation 11:3 and also the male child in Revelation 12:5, I guess that means that I am supposed to perform (as opposed to expecting the world to stop for me).
As my letter-writing progressed during the 1990s, I learned of the concept of 'Delayed Gratification' and today I no longer even picture any day of recognition. I am simply grateful to have an enjoyable life and, of course, thankful to God to give me a platform of authority and influence in Rev. 11:3 and Rev. 12:5 from which to exert what influence I possess through a letter-writing effort to those in the highest positions of power and authority.
If you can think of any party or avenue that could lead to my manuscript getting published, I would welcome your help.
I do thank you for your time and please do not bother with reading the enclosed materials unless and until your time allows.
Take Care.
Sincerely Yours,
Supersweet101
P.S. If you have any
questions, please
let me know.
(Enclosed with this letter are copies of the most significant correspondence that I have received since I began my letter-writing effort, about 20 letters in all.)
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(I added the following paragraphs to this narrative on January 30, 2006.)
About 2 1/2 months after writing the letter above to the Dean of the College of Engineering at the University of Missouri-Columbia, around March 22, 2004, I was idly glancing through the newsletter produced by MU's engineering school entitled 'MIZZOU ENGINEERING NEWS' that I had recently received, their Spring, 2004 issue (Volume 5, Number 1) and out of the corner of my eye, I saw my name in print under 'Alumni Notes' and my heart really jumped!!
The following is what the College of Engineering chose to write in this entry:
"(Supersweet101), BS AgE '76, of Hannibal, Mo. says although AgE was his major, astronomy was his first love and writing, his passion. You can view his recent manuscript online at: www.writer.net/writers/supersweet101"
(Of course, 'Supersweet101' was not used in this entry under the 'Alumni Notes' and is the moniker I used for my actual name for this blog page. This web address shown in this entry is what I call my 'flagship posting' on the Internet, first posted in May, 2002, and is essentially what I have posted on the first blog narrative on this site entitled, 'The Essence of the Olivet Discourse'.)
This entry accomplished something that I had long given up on: seeing my name in print in an independent publication regarding my writing effort prior to Christ's return to earth.
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The link below should take you to my profile on blogger.com in which I have posted two blogs.
1) My discussion of the Olivet Discourse and my writing effort since 1991
2) The Time Capsule Letter that I wrote to my 5-year-old son in 1986 of which I am very proud (and had no idea of its significance when I wrote it)
http://www.blogger.com/profile/7227366
I have shared this interpretation of Luke 21:25a and Matthew 24:29-30a and my prediction that there will be no Antichrist or cataclysmic end of the world prior to Christ's return with many, many publishers. But I simply cannot overcome the pervasive expectation and teaching of this widely expected scenario to take place prior to Christ's return.
The simplest way that I explain this to others is that, as I update this in February, 2026, we are all now 34 years closer to the day of Christ's return to earth than we were when I first had my business-sized prophecy cards produced in February, 1992 bearing, initially, Matthew 24:29 and Matthew 24:36a on the front side and those three 1999 celestial events fulfilling Matthew 24:29 on the back side.
Beginning with the second version of these cards in 1996, I would quote Luke 21:25a and Matthew 24:29-30a on the front side of these cards and those same three 1999 celestial events fulfilling Matthew 24:29 are shown on the back side. See my blog entitled: "My Five Versions of Prophecy Cards; 1992-2012".
Click here for my blog narrative "My Five Versions of Prophecy Cards; 1992-2012"
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The answer to the number progression problem is: '5'
The sum of the digits in each number is 10. (i.e. 4+1+2+3=10)
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Dr. Niall Ferguson,
If you are interested in the highlights of the process of my discovery, attached below is the first of two e-mails that I have saved in my 'Messages Sent' folder that I am sending you. As with all difficult experiences, gaining these seldom-considered insights were as difficult as pulling hen's teeth but, as is usually the case, they are clear in hindsight.
The letter below is the beginning of 'the following three years would turn out to be a concerted effort on my part to get to the bottom of the truth', beginning in March, 1989 as mentioned in my blog, 'The Essence of the Olivet Discourse'.
Supersweet101
********************************************
On August 11, 1989, Denise broke the news to me that she could only be married to a man of her denomination. By this time, I had a small toe hold in the Two Witnesses story of Chapter 11 of Revelation. My main reaction was one of amusement as Denise did not know of the Matthew 24:29-30a prophecy or the Chapter 11 story and I wondered, "How is this going to turn out?"
I trusted God to provide for me the answers that I would need during the upcoming months and He did. About two weeks later, Denise told me over the phone that she was now in a committed relationship, which I correctly assumed was Eddie.
I was a veritable religious zealot at this time but still pretty much a private one. I assumed that somehow, at some time, I would identify some world leader with '666' as according with Revelation 13:18.
On September 12, 1989, as I was driving down a highway in Columbia, MO (where I was living), I was recalling solving a very difficult number progression problem on an IQ test during a hospitalization eight months earlier and, after I solved it, I handed the test back to a nurse and I told her, "I got the son of a bitch!" As I completed that thought as I was driving, I noticed that in front of me, I was following a car that had a license plate ending with '666', which I thought was unusual. That evening, I inscribed in the front of my Bible of Discovery '9-12-89', signifying that I was 100% certain that I was one of the two individuals in Revelation 11:3. I realized that, theoretically, sometime before Spring, 1996 (6 1/2 years away), I should identify this Antichrist but I was worried that I might slip up and miss it.
(The number progression problem that took me 5 minutes to solve was:
4123, 82, 73, 14_
The answer is at the very end of this narrative.)
Six days later, on September 18, 1989, I was in traffic and at a stop light, and I was once again behind a car with a license plate ending with '666' which, of course, I picked up on. That evening, I went home, turned on the TV and watched the last 15 minutes of the movie, "A Star is Born" (on the Lifetime Channel) with Kris Kristofferson and Barbra Streisand. After the movie was over, on a nearby coffee table was a 9-15-89 issue (3 days old) of a USA Today newspaper and I quickly saw a headline that said: 'Boris Yeltsin: A Star is Born' about Russian leader Boris Yeltsin who was touring this country and wowing politicians here as he was an up-and-coming politician in the USSR. From this article, I read that when Yeltsin was a child, a hand grenade exploded in his left hand causing him to lose a thumb and index finger on that hand.
Because I was certain that I had come 'face to face' with the person who was to kill me around March, 1996 (in fulfillment of Revelation 11:7-13), I was extremely scared. As I wrote in my manuscript, "All of a sudden, I did not want to be a Chapter 11 witness!"
The following day, I went to Gerbes supermarket where I did my grocery shopping and paced the aisles for 10 minutes or so. I had decided that when I stopped pacing, I would imagine being killed by Yeltsin's forces----and I did not want to stop pacing!!! When I did stop pacing, I closed my eyes and winced.
During this time, I thought that Denise and I would eventually get back together, hopefully soon, and I assumed that Denise and I would perform an openly public ministry on a worldwide scale between Fall, 1992 through Spring, 1996, which meant public speaking which I greatly detested. Three days after associating Yeltsin with '666', I read Chapter 12 of Revelation for the first time on September 21, 1989. I quickly suspected the male child in Revelation 12:5 to be me and within three seconds of analyzing 'iron rod', I saw my 'felt pen' and 'female name' and I was greatly relieved because if there was one thing that I can do and enjoy doing, it was writing.
(My Bible reads in Revelation 12:5, "She gave birth to a son--a boy destined to shepherd all the nations with an iron rod.")
[This is because from chemistry, the chemical symbol for iron is Fe. Felt pens (with the trademark 'Skilcraft') are in the shape of a 'rod' and have been my pen of choice since I began my engineering career with the USDA in 1976, 13 years earlier. And, lastly, 'Rod' is a 'male name'. Very soon after analyzing 'iron rod' in Revelation 12:5, I easily saw the following:
iron rod
-|- --- |
Fe(lt) Pen = Skilcraft
Fe male name = Denise
At this time, September 21, 1989, I was amazed at how a 1900 year old scripture could easily be interpreted as being two instruments germane to me (and I still am) but it answered some very fundamental questions as to how I would publicize this interpretation of Matthew 24:29-30a to the world-at-large.]
All during the last part of August and all of September, 1989, I noticed many unusual coincidences that I simply could not explain away as being meaningless and I believed that they were divine in nature and I jotted them on my wall calendar. One that I had noticed at this time was that the driver's license that I had when I first wrote Denise had a renewal date of September 3, 1988 which would turn out to be the date of her heart-lung transplant operation three weeks after I met Denise. And, as it is in many states, on the back side of Missouri driver's licenses is a donor's card one can sign to be an organ donor. Because there were three years (1095 days) between renewal dates for Missouri driver's licenses (in 1989), I knew that I could not have made up a more perfect sign from God.
On October 4, 1989, I realized that I was getting out of control due to my religious zeal and, as per my brother's recommendation, I admitted myself into a psychiatric ward as I saw this as an opportunity to establish the truth by telling my story to a psychiatrist and he would surely be able to tell that no other Christian astronomer living at this time has experienced an account as unique as mine. After assuring me that, "What will be, will be. The medicine should not matter," my doctor would tell me that my signs from God were merely loose associations and that my belief that I was in Revelation 12:5 was a delusion and was a departure from reality---which shocked me that my credibility would ever be questioned by anyone!
In the hallway of the psyche ward while my doctor was between seeing patients, I cornered him, showed him my old driver's license and explained to him the extraordinary coincidence of the renewal date matching the date of Denise's heart-lung transplant operation and how that was a one out of a 1000 coincidence. My doctor nodded in acknowledgement and went about treating other patients.
Two weeks after admission, I was drugged out of my gourd from the meds that I had blindly agreed to take and I was so extremely embarrassed of the belief that I had when I entered the hospital.
One month later, that belief came back and I admitted myself back into the hospital to try one more time to obtain 'validation' and once again, 11 days later, I was discharged feeling horrible from the side effects of the meds.
Years later, I would realize that of all the things that my doctor knew for certain when he met me, two of them were:
1) He did not know whether or not I was truly in Rev. 11:3 and Rev. 12:5
2) He knew that he would never know whether or not I was in Rev. 11:3 and Rev. 12:5
After spending an excruciatingly miserable winter of 1989-1990, my doctor changed my meds to very mild ones and, three weeks later, I could not believe how good life could feel again. In my manuscript I wrote, "In April, 1990, life was again sweet. I was very thankful to my doctor for ridding me of the 'Revelation Demon'."
I once again became productive at work, though I did not like my job as well as my previous one.
On June 5, 1990, I wrote a 15 page letter to Denise's father, partly to explain the delusion that I had suffered from and that I was $10,000 poorer and almost lost my job. In my letter, I referred to that driver's license coincidence and wrote, "I wondered why God would allow that one out of a 1000 coincidence to trip me up even further."
I made a copy of that lengthy letter and gave it to my doctor the next morning, to which he asked me, "What do want me to do with this?"
I replied, "I just want you to read it. I feel better with you having it."
I primarily wanted my doctor to know that I had a better understanding of my delusion. A night or two later, as I pictured Denise's parents reading my letter (and hoping that it would tug at their consciences), I thought of the reference I made to that one out of a 1000 driver's license coincidence and realized that it was similar to a baseball hitter having a 0.999 batting average---a pretty darn good one! At that moment, a physiological sensation flowed from the top of my brain throughout my nervous system and my whole body had a warm flush feeling for a second or two. I immediately suspected that this sensation was caused by the cumulative effect of all the medicine that I had taken during the previous seven months and I decided to see my doctor the next morning concerning the significance of that driver's license coincidence.
At about 6:30 a.m. the next morning, I approached my doctor in the hallway of the psyche ward and I told him, firmly, "That driver's license wasn't a sign from God. It was a billboard from God with a small hole in it."
In a slightly disgusted tone of voice, my doctor asked me, "If you ARE this person, what are you worried about? I have patients to attend to. I don't have time for you!"
I slowly turned away from him with my jaw dropping very far with, I am sure, a very astonished look on my face. I don't think that anyone can understand the level of shock that registered inside of me when this same doctor who had spent the previous eight months telling me and convincing me that this whole belief that I had discovered in a timely way was an unfortunate delusion was now telling me that it might be true after all.
I would be approved for disability retirement in October, 1990, partly because I couldn't concentrate on my job when I had this pre-ordained destiny consuming my mind and also partly because I hated my job which seemed extremely trivial in comparison.
I moved back to southeast Missouri, fully expecting to reunite with Denise and we would prepare for our worldwide ministry that scripturally would take place between Fall, 1992 through Spring, 1996 and then we would be killed by the Antichrist in the person of Boris Yeltsin who I would be announcing to the world was the aspiring Antichrist and my and Denise's fulfillment of Revelation 11:7-13 would show this and I could not wait to prove lots of people wrong!
And then on December 13, 1990, I began to think the unthinkable: What if there really is no Antichrist? I caught myself wondering if this was wishful thinking on my part to be spared of the fate described in Rev. 11:7-13. I then began to consider the immense suffering that I went through for my faith and, of course, Denise also went through indescribable suffering with her heart-lung transplant operation and recovery and I began to see that these are the trials and sufferings that the Two Witnesses would go through. I also knew of a pre-existing principle that argued against the concept of an Antichrist and it is one that I learned in the early 1980s through my interest in investing, the Principle of Contrarian Opinion, which says:
Whenever there is a wide consensus on a point, it is usually wrong.
This was true in October, 1929 and also in 2000 when bullishness on the stock market was so extreme that everyone who was planning to buy stocks had bought, leaving the market vulnerable to selling pressure, thus sending the market down.
I thought, "Every Bible has the Antichrist story in the Book of Revelation."
So, to implement the principle of contrarian opinion, I mailed a letter of warning (containing the Matthew 24:29-30a prophecy) to Moscow and also mailed a copy of that letter to the Wall Street Journal.
The following November, 1991, I committed myself to conducting a letter-writing effort to those in the highest positions of power, authority, and influence for the rest of my life and am continuing to do so (though it has slowed down considerably as of late).
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Dr. Ferguson,
In the narrative that I e-mailed to you before this one that describes my key turning point experiences between August 11, 1989 through December 13, 1990, it ends with my realizing that the scene described in Revelation 11:7-13 may very well be incongruent with reality. This led me to mailing a several page letter to the Kremlin in Moscow containing what I concluded is the only plausible interpretation of Matthew 24:29-30a and I mailed a copy of this letter (which I wrote anonymously) to the Wall Street Journal. I would later look back on mailing those two letters as being the beginning of demonstrating to myself that the Antichrist concept is a myth and that I have suffered enough.
Two months later, in February, 1991, I stopped by an empty Catholic church in Poplar Bluff, Missouri to pray for a few minutes, anxiously waiting to hear from Denise (as I had written letters to her family explaining my situation). I also asked God why doors were not opening up for me at a time when it seemed that doors should be opening up for me as I simply could not get anything 'off the ground' despite the conventional wisdom, it seemed, that this outwardly open ministry, by definition, should certainly get off the ground.
I then got up the courage to talk to a Catholic priest and, after exchanging a few pleasantries, I had to ask him, "Are you aware of Matthew 24:29?!"
The priest cautiously replied, "I think it has to do with the Last Days."
I then recited Matthew 24:29-30a to the priest as I had this scripture memorized since age 9 or 10 and I then rattled off those three 1999 celestial events described in my web posting and I would later put on cards.
The priest replied, "Yes, I've heard of that," which struck me as very odd.
I told this priest that Chapter 11 of the Book of Revelation speaks of Two Witnesses who are to prophesy. I sheepishly admitted to him, "I went to a psychiatrist to try to get a piece of paper saying that I was one of those Two Witnesses but I didn't get one."
I feared for what kind of negative reaction this priest might have for me and he gently pointed out, "None of the prophets had a piece of paper."
After I realized what this priest was saying, I exclaimed, "That's right!" And I thought, "Come to think of it, Jesus didn't have a piece of paper, either."
When we parted company, this priest told me, "1999 will be nice."
Three months later, in May, 1991, I wrote in a letter to the late Dr. Carl Sagan of Cornell University, "I guess it took me a long time before I realized that no one is going to walk up to the boy in Revelation 12:5 and say, 'Hey, you are the center of Revelation.'"
I moved to Hannibal the following month, June, 1991, and I mentioned to my mother that I was weaning myself off of the meds which, as you can imagine, greatly concerned her and she insisted that I see my psychiatrist to find out what meds I should be taking.
I agreed to see him and I was kind of curious of what my doctor thought of my beliefs. So, on June 19, 1991, I saw my doctor for a 30 minute session and I explained to him that my mother insisted that I see him. I raised my arms up along both sides of my head, flipped my hands backwards and I flippantly told my doctor, "I'm in Revelation and that's it."
He prescribed 5 mg Navane and explained, "This won't change your thoughts but it will help your thinking."
I told him that I still thought that I was meant to publicize this interpretation of Matthew 24:29-30a to the world.
My doctor asked me, "You want to prophesy?"
I replied, "No, interpret."
He asked, "Tell the world?"
I replied, "Yes."
He asked, "Why?"
I exclaimed, "So people will get their act together! To reduce the odds of there being an Antichrist."
He replied, "I thought you said that there was no Antichrist."
I replied, "I don't know."
For the first time, I explained to him how I associated Boris Yeltsin with '666' on September 18, 1989 (two weeks before I first met my doctor). I went on to tell him how I mailed a letter of warning to Moscow and a copy of that letter to the Wall Street Journal six months earlier hoping to make a difference.
As this session drew to a close, I welled up with a fierce sense of anger and self-pity and I yelled at my doctor, "A year ago, it dawned on me that no one's going to tell that boy (in Revelation 12:5) who he is!!"
My doctor gently replied, "I think you're right," followed by him looking up at me twice from his note pad, which I knew was unusual and out of character for him to do and I wondered what that double glance meant. I occasionally pondered on that double glance during the next four months until I realized on October 21, 1991 that he had told me the words that I had waited 21 months to hear my doctor tell me: "I think you're right."
(I jumped up off my sofa and wrote on my wall calendar on that date, 10-21-91, "I.T.Y.R.")
Years later, I was able to better express this in that my doctor's double glance was likely his way to let me know that I had gained an insight that perhaps a first year psychiatry major knows and that is:
"If any person is ever born into this world who has a genuine, scripturally pre-ordained destiny, that no human being is going to tell that person that he or she does, indeed, have one."
At the end of my last session with my doctor on June 19, 1991, he gave me the unsolicited advice, "Don't talk about it," which seemed to run against conventional wisdom for me at that time but, fortunately, I eventually understood why he gave me that advice, as I told a woman in 1998, "I see two reasons why he gave me that advice:
1) If I am wrong, bad things happen to me if I talk about it.
2) If I am correct and I talk about it, bad things happen to me."
This woman observed, "You lose either way." And I nodded my head in agreement.
In April, 1993 was the Waco tragedy involving David Koresh and the Branch Davidians and some commentators at that time worried that with the approach of the turn of the millennium that there may be more groups like them pop up. And this is what led me to write my manuscript, starting in May, 1993, to try to head off such groups--plus I needed to record my quite extensive biographical details before it became a real struggle to recollect them.
I was in touch with a vanity press at the time and they told me on July 6, 1993 that I needed Denise's written permission to include her many letters to me (which are very glowing and flattering of me) in my book should it get published. That upcoming Saturday, July 10, 1993, was Denise's day of worship and I decided to make the four hour trip from Hannibal to her church to obtain her written permission and I planned to mail a note to her parents telling them of my plan to come down (at this time, I am not on the best of terms with them, to put it mildly).
Before I mailed that note, I called the sheriff of Denise's home county to tell him of my plan to come down that Saturday and the reason why.
The sheriff replied, "Oh, the Rauls girl (Denise) passed away a couple of weeks ago."
I, of course, was shocked (but not surprised as it had been nearly 5 years since Denise's heart-lung transplant operation). I asked the sheriff, "Did you hear it from a reliable source?"
He replied, "Oh, it had been going around that she had been going down for a while."
I finished by saying, "Well, I'll definately not be going down there."
I took a brief hiatus from writing my manuscript over the next few days and I knew how my manuscript (and my personal account with Denise) would probably conclude---I just didn't know when, for sure. It was a very strange feeling as I was all by myself and very alone in this thought process. My recollection of what I wrote near my manuscript's conclusion is:
"I once again realized that Dr. Frazier's words, almost religious in nature, would prove to be true: "What will be, will be. The medicine should not matter." On June 1, 1989, I pictured Denise and myself as being the Two Chapter 11 Witnesses and as I thought these thoughts on July 10, 1993, I noticed a small smile emerging on my face. I was going to be able to undercut Eddie (Denise's husband) after all. Today, the fifth anniversary of learning of Denise and her plight would be a superb day to declare Denise to be the female witness of Chapter 11 of the Book of Revelation in the Christian Holy Bible! I was very pleased to give Denise an honor that her family did everything in their power to keep from her."
************************************************
Well, Bethany, because I am a hunt-and-peck type typist, using only one hand, my right hand is getting that 'carpal tunnel feeling' so I am going to have to stop. I did want to give you a substantive account of how my manuscript concludes. I really did, all along, want to reconcile with Denise and I was able to.
(Do you understand why I believe that my manuscript is 'The Second Greatest Story Ever Told'?)
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The e-mail above was originally written to a well known writer for a financial news magazine who has been kind enough to correspond with me, despite her busy schedule.
Because my 21 months of psychotherapy described in these two e-mails took place over 13 years ago, it seems like it happened to someone else (thank God). But I am nevertheless very proud of accomplishing what I call 'The Ultimate Mental Challenge'.
As I told a local TV news anchorwoman in February, 1999 when she called me in response to the letter that I wrote to her, "It's just that by 1991, I realized that no one's going to tap that person on the shoulder and say, 'Hey, you are meant to do this,' and by 1992, I realized that there are no perks that come with this belief system and that my place in scripture and 27 cents will buy me coffee at Hardees."
She replied, "Huh."
When she asked me, "What do you hope to achieve? What is your goal?", I replied, "Oh, gosh, I don't know, uh......to have a cohesive effect, uh.....that current world leaders to try to solve the world's problems before Christ returns."
I hope these two e-mails make some sense to you. If one is not interested in astronomy, they probably are a little difficult to understand.
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Shown below is the cover letter that I wrote in January to the Dean of the College of Engineering at my alma mater (where I earned a B.S. in engineering in 1976) in which I describe to him my writing effort since 1991.
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(Transcribed on May 8, 2004)
January 6, 2004
Dear Dean Xxxxxxx,
I decided to write you this letter and send you the enclosed materials on a hunch that my e-mail to you last month likely piqued your curiosity, if you're like most engineers.
On the last page of my 4 page mass mailing letter dated April 16, 1998 (which is enclosed) is a synopsis of my manuscript and letter writing effort in the form of a query letter to prospective publishers and what I call 'The Chronology of My Discovery'. Because religious experiences are, by definition, nearly impossible to successfully communicate to another, I will not spend any time to do so in this letter. It would turn out to take about two years before I gained an insight that my psychiatrist likely possessed when I met him in October, 1989: If any person is ever born into this world who has a genuine, pre-ordained destiny that no human being is going to tell that person that he or she does, indeed, have one. (Essentially, I am fulfilling a role similar to the one that John the Baptist had in that I am heralding Christ's Second Coming. I have found that in this world that this can only be done through writing.)
I have told a few in recent years that had I known, while I was in college, what was in store for me at age 35 in 1989, I would have enrolled in a college course entitled:
Genuine Scripturally Pre-ordained Destinies 101:
What to Expect and What Not to Expect
By October, 1991, I realized that if it is true that I am one of the two individuals in Revelation 11:3 and also the male child in Revelation 12:5, I guess that means that I am supposed to perform (as opposed to expecting the world to stop for me).
As my letter-writing progressed during the 1990s, I learned of the concept of 'Delayed Gratification' and today I no longer even picture any day of recognition. I am simply grateful to have an enjoyable life and, of course, thankful to God to give me a platform of authority and influence in Rev. 11:3 and Rev. 12:5 from which to exert what influence I possess through a letter-writing effort to those in the highest positions of power and authority.
If you can think of any party or avenue that could lead to my manuscript getting published, I would welcome your help.
I do thank you for your time and please do not bother with reading the enclosed materials unless and until your time allows.
Take Care.
Sincerely Yours,
Supersweet101
P.S. If you have any
questions, please
let me know.
(Enclosed with this letter are copies of the most significant correspondence that I have received since I began my letter-writing effort, about 20 letters in all.)
**********************************************
(I added the following paragraphs to this narrative on January 30, 2006.)
About 2 1/2 months after writing the letter above to the Dean of the College of Engineering at the University of Missouri-Columbia, around March 22, 2004, I was idly glancing through the newsletter produced by MU's engineering school entitled 'MIZZOU ENGINEERING NEWS' that I had recently received, their Spring, 2004 issue (Volume 5, Number 1) and out of the corner of my eye, I saw my name in print under 'Alumni Notes' and my heart really jumped!!
The following is what the College of Engineering chose to write in this entry:
"(Supersweet101), BS AgE '76, of Hannibal, Mo. says although AgE was his major, astronomy was his first love and writing, his passion. You can view his recent manuscript online at: www.writer.net/writers/supersweet101"
(Of course, 'Supersweet101' was not used in this entry under the 'Alumni Notes' and is the moniker I used for my actual name for this blog page. This web address shown in this entry is what I call my 'flagship posting' on the Internet, first posted in May, 2002, and is essentially what I have posted on the first blog narrative on this site entitled, 'The Essence of the Olivet Discourse'.)
This entry accomplished something that I had long given up on: seeing my name in print in an independent publication regarding my writing effort prior to Christ's return to earth.
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The link below should take you to my profile on blogger.com in which I have posted two blogs.
1) My discussion of the Olivet Discourse and my writing effort since 1991
2) The Time Capsule Letter that I wrote to my 5-year-old son in 1986 of which I am very proud (and had no idea of its significance when I wrote it)
http://www.blogger.com/profile/7227366
I have shared this interpretation of Luke 21:25a and Matthew 24:29-30a and my prediction that there will be no Antichrist or cataclysmic end of the world prior to Christ's return with many, many publishers. But I simply cannot overcome the pervasive expectation and teaching of this widely expected scenario to take place prior to Christ's return.
The simplest way that I explain this to others is that, as I update this in February, 2026, we are all now 34 years closer to the day of Christ's return to earth than we were when I first had my business-sized prophecy cards produced in February, 1992 bearing, initially, Matthew 24:29 and Matthew 24:36a on the front side and those three 1999 celestial events fulfilling Matthew 24:29 on the back side.
Beginning with the second version of these cards in 1996, I would quote Luke 21:25a and Matthew 24:29-30a on the front side of these cards and those same three 1999 celestial events fulfilling Matthew 24:29 are shown on the back side. See my blog entitled: "My Five Versions of Prophecy Cards; 1992-2012".
Click here for my blog narrative "My Five Versions of Prophecy Cards; 1992-2012"
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The answer to the number progression problem is: '5'
The sum of the digits in each number is 10. (i.e. 4+1+2+3=10)
